Stuck in the Future
It was already Tuesday morning today! Already waiting for the next weekend? Or the winter holiday a few weeks away? The spring trip to the south, summer, big music festivals, live bands on summer evening terraces, or an extreme holiday full of adventures…
Do those healthy expectations give you energy and a feeling of nice, calm and inspiring everyday life for tomorrow, which is already Wednesday, by the way… Or do they instead create a top-level comparison that makes tomorrow and the whole normal week feel like dull crap?!
Of course everyone looks forward to those special things listed in the beginning. But it is not a bad thing at all to not load big expectations onto a basic weekend.
If you´ve developed a habit where everyday life does not give you much joy or happiness right now, you are probably just a bit stuck and caught in something in the future. Drifting into waiting mode and giving up the feeling of control connected to enjoying the moment can create dissatisfaction.
I started thinking about this when I read a post about living in a constant state of waiting by Freia Luminka on the Hidasta Elämää blog. Read it!
Finally, Home Every Night
Traditionally, I’ve been deep stuck in the “the grass is greener on the other side” thinking and putting things off until later. I really have sulked about how it takes forever to get to something fun, while everyone else seems to already enjoy life, travel, do hobbies, and chase experiences! Then you pile on a few “Groundhog Day”-type draining workdays, and in the end, the feeling often has been that nothing happens during work, life slips away, and it just passes you by.
My expectations usually haven’t been about the future, because my focus has been living day by day, without long-term goals. Even just the year before last, I craved events, attention, and something to fill the emptiness. Life already had the pieces for happiness, but it still didn’t always feel enough. My restless soul tried its best, as always, to enjoy being home fully—and almost managed it.
I smile here by myself, realizing that right now I’m nowhere near that restlessness. I smile here while I notice how far I’ve actually come. I don’t dream of events or trips, even though I know I could make them happen. I’m not building some experience void where the next summer’s plans always have to outdo previous years.
I don’t load big expectations onto a normal weekend, because I know it’s good for me that the weekend isn’t a big escape and every day is kind of equal! Right now, what I look forward to the most is an ordinary weekday evening—slowing down. Gathering my thoughts and pausing. Touch, laughter, peace, life updates, and moments with people. My own life at my home, or my homes.
Is a Miracle Needed?
…for the small everyday moments to start feeling like happiness? In my case, no enlightenment or out-of-body experience. I guess I just got fed up with obsessing over my own happiness or misery.
Lately, finding joy in everyday life for me has come from moments of simply being and thinking. I need my own time to sit and read the news about what’s happening at home or around the world, and what people around me are doing. The key is to stop constantly checking what I need, what I’m missing, and what’s enough. To pause, feel my smallness in this universe, and take a side role.
Safe in My Own Smallness
It’s calming to notice that I get really happy from following the world and making sense of it, thinking with my own brain without having a role in it. Happiness finally comes from outside, from what others do. It takes the pressure off my own shoulders to try to be perfect or not make mistakes, or do something stupid. Extremely freeing! I follow politics quite a bit, even though I’ve kept it pretty much in the background on my blog for now. Let me go for it for a moment!
Throwing yourself into a side role is made easier by the fact that right now, the world’s major powers are led by reality-shielded, senile, attention-hungry, and/or spoiled narcissists. Somehow, it makes it easier to forgive your own weaknesses.
Now that it’s mentioned, I’ll offer two completely neutral entertainment options. Tonight in six hours, at 2 a.m. Finnish time (Feb24th 9:00pm ET), you can catch the SOTU (the U.S. president’s annual State of the Union address to Congress) or the alternative frog-themed version, State of the Swamp.
Could it be that it took global chaos and the breakdown of the rules-based world order for me to start trusting my own thinking and myself? I can now form opinions on even unfamiliar topics and be satisfied with my logical reasoning—if those people out there managed to reach a position of power.
A Risky Game Or a Sure Loss?
Is waiting for future plans and sulking through everyday life a risky strategy? How much “suffering” and waiting do you have to accept for the wait to actually be worth it? To me, it all depends on how you bake your ice and scoop your cake. Life plans and the waiting itself should tease you and bring joy. If you measure time as a sacrifice, it’s a sure loss.
Everyday Happiness
This actually isn’t the first time I’ve written about everyday happiness. July 3, 2025: Excitingly normal. Back then I was already thinking how crazy it is to be alive only on holidays, and I was already excited about normal days! Now I understand why I’m probably my own blog’s most enthusiastic reader. That post tells me a lot about my steady change. When I read last July’s text, I realize how anxious I still was about my ego-driven self-analysis back then.
Straight For the Target
So my direction is good. Of course, hours run short when I try to enjoy every evening to the fullest. And of course, I still crave the rarer outings and shaking off the dust of my hometown. In the long run, it should be enough for me that all areas of life are at least somewhat active—regardless of schedules going off track or something taking a temporary pause.
When I follow the top link and read My Goals, I now notice that I’m neglecting Sleep and Friends. So when I sleep well and plan outings with my friends, I remember that I have no reason to worry about my other goals. They’re not going anywhere.
Life in Motion
What if we’re not stuck in everyday life—but stuck in the thought that everyday life isn’t enough? Next time you catch yourself waiting for the weekend, a holiday, or some “real life,” think about everything you already have to dive into, and what’s really stopping you!? And what if you stopped waiting for salvation from the future and decided that your life is already happening—here, today, on a Tuesday night? Start now and turn a sure loss into a win!
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